Open mouth, Insert foot.

Have you ever said something and as soon as it ventured from your lips and cast its words out into the world you wanted to immediately reel it back into your mouth, stuffing it as far down your throat as it could go in hopes to stop the sounds from getting to someone else's ear? Yeah. That's the month day I had. I'd like to blame it on the lack of blood flow to my brain these days, but there's probably no valid excuse. I can only say I'm sorry and I'll try to stop my foot from getting anywhere near my face in the future. I can't even see my feet these days without bending over, so you would think this would be easier for me.

Secret to a Better Marriage

Just when I was beginning to wonder what to put on my birthday list, they went and created the perfect gift. I think I'll add this to my go-to pile of surefire wedding gifts! :) They call it the Official Better Marriage Blanket and they say that it's an as seen on TV special, but I must not be watching TV at the right times because I haven't seen it before. It "Completely & Quickly Absorbs The Odor Of Flatulence". How's that for a selling point?!

Here's my favorite marketing line from their web site:
•Contains the same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons


Ha! I love it! I wonder if they provide one to every solider when they give him an MRE with beans in it, too?

{courtesy of Apartment Therapy}

Man Cave

A few weeks ago, Lawrence went to a tupperware Man Cave party. If these haven't hit your neighborhood yet, they soon will, so wives, hide the checkbooks now. Our neighbor Andy hosted the little shindig (you can read more about the famous Andy here), and even though I thought I was safe from a sale since our grill was BROKEN, Lawrence still managed to come home with $60 worth of brats and pork chops. What's that saying about selling ice to an eskimo? Yeah. Oh, and did I mention we then had to spend $40 to get the grill fixed? Double yeah. I don't want to hear it the next time I come home from a jewelry party with a new bracelet or earrings, boys.

Growing Old.

Recently my grandma's longtime companion passed away. We called him her boyfriend, but it was so much more than that when you're 91. They spent every waking moment together, drinking coffee, playing cards, holding hands in the dark while watching football. And now that she doesn't have a companion, I'm not quite sure what will happen to her in the months to come. It reminded me that I never want to get old. And if I do get old, Lawrence better be right there beside me. It also reminded me about the lack of happy alternatives to living arrangements there are out there for old people. So this morning when I ran accross the Eden Alternative and their 10 Principles it gave me some hope. I'm not sure how much they have caught on at assisted living facilities here in central Iowa, but hopefully over the next 50 years we'll come around.

1. The three plagues of loneliness, helplessness, and boredom account for the bulk of suffering among our Elders.


2. An Elder-centered community commits to creating a human habitat where life revolves around close and continuing contact with plants, animals, and children. It is these relationships that provide the young and old alike with a pathway to a life worth living.

3. Loving companionship is the antidote to loneliness. Elders deserve easy access to human and animal companionship.

4. An Elder-centered community creates opportunity to give as well as receive care. This is the antidote to helplessness.

5. An Elder-centered community imbues daily life with variety and spontaneity by creating an environment in which unexpected and unpredictable interactions and happenings can take place. This is the antidote to boredom.

6. Meaningless activity corrodes the human spirit. The opportunity to do things that we find meaningful is essential to human health.

7. Medical treatment should be the servant of genuine human caring, never its master.
8. An Elder-centered community honors its Elders by de-emphasizing top-down bureaucratic authority, seeking instead to place the maximum possible decision-making authority into the hands of the Elders or into the hands of those closest to them.
9. Creating an Elder-centered community is a never-ending process. Human growth must never be separated from human life.
10. Wise leadership is the lifeblood of any struggle against the three plagues. For it, there can be no substitute.